A question from Germany:
I know you are not a neo-tantra teacher, but you don’t talk about sex at all! Isn’t sex a part of Tantra, even traditional Tantra?
All expressions of human life are part of traditional Tantra, including sex. I haven’t talked about sex much on Jaya Kula because, oddly enough, no one has ever asked me to!
Tantra offers two basic approaches to sex: one is through the life science of Ayurveda and the other is through ritual worship.
Tantrik Ayurveda teaches us to balance our doshas and conserve energy. Most “ordinary” sex is Vata, or wind provoking, and depleting.
General depletion is not an unavoidable aspect of recreational or procreational sex, but most people do not know how to engage in sexual activity in a non-depleting way. A good Ayurvedic doctor or Tantrik teacher can help you with this.
I am not talking about withholding fluids. I am talking about basic sexual sanity.
Basic sexual sanity means:
1. Have sex at the right time of day and in the right way for your constitution.
2. Pay attention to seasonal impacts on your doshas as they relate to sexual activity.
3. Clarify your reason for having sex in any particular instance. Is it just for fun? Are you making babies? Are you doing it out of fear or some other emotion? Confusion about motives for having sex is one of the primary reasons sex is depleting.
4. Get clarity about how much of your sexual activity, in general, is supporting your self-image formation and is thereby depleting, and how much is really a natural, enlivening expression.
5. Absolutely NEVER have sex when you don’t want to. NEVER fake it, put on a show, or engage in sex while you are distracted or inebriated.
6. Bring even to recreational sex an attitude or bhava of ritual worship.
Maithuna, or sexual yoga between a male and female, is not sex in the usual sense. Maithuna is sexualized ritual. According to the ancient Tantras, only those who have already recognized the open natural state and can maintain themselves in non-attached relaxation are suited to participate in maithuna. There are other qualifications, too.
Maithuna is one way, a powerful way, of encountering the heart of creation everywhere. But it is not the only way. My experience is that few people are truly suited to the practice of maithuna. But you do not have to practice sexual yoga to Self-realize on the path of direct realization Tantra.
In Ma’s love,
Shambhavi
